There IS Life After Loss
© Betty Sue Eaton
Sometimes after we have experienced a tragic loss, it seems as though our lives are forever
shattered and there is no path to continue on. We go from an everyday life of habit and relative
happiness to a totally changed world where nothing is familiar and certainly, we have to discard
the old habits and start from scratch. The fabric of our existence has been torn apart; we are
left with nothing but unending sadness and total shock!

One such tragedy happened to a friend of mine. One day, she was happily married, doing all
the things that two happy people do, making plans for the future after retirement. But that was
still years away since they were only in their late 40's and early 50's. Then the unthinkable
happened. Jim dropped dead at work! That day began a spiraling down for Virginia, and she
confided in me and other women supporting her through her grief that she just wanted to be
with Jim. There was a better than even chance that she would be soon because she had
already undergone a double heart by-pass surgery but continued to have life-threatening

We formed a grief counseling and recovery group based on the words found in the Bible and at
each meeting dedicated our time to studying what God had to say about death and life after
death - ours AND our loved ones. What we found there surprised us. We learned that although
our Savior is a loving Father, He does allow us to be brought to our knees by circumstance,
and when we are there on our knees, we are in the perfect position to go to Him for comfort and
solace. We had to learn to give all the grief and heartbreak to Him as He is the Master of all
things - even death and grief.

None of the five of us who were regulars in the group knew just what would come out of our
sessions, but we knew we were there for each other. Even though my own tragedies of family
member' deaths occurred years before that time, I was able to face the unresolved grief that I
held in my heart of hearts. We wept openly, unashamedly, and welcomed the loving comfort of
our fellow mourners. In the end, we all grew in our Christian devotion more than any of us
thought would happen.

We still keep in frequent touch with one another and last night, I called Virginia. She was
laughing and said she would have to call back as she had a roomful of ladies and was
demonstrating a salad making machine! Now that is not much to get excited about, but for me, it
was like her declaration of independence! She has moved on since Jim's death; she is living
again; and even though she still has a very bad heart, she is making plans for tomorrow. She
has turned it all over to the Lord whom she loves with every fiber in her being. If anyone ever
was, she is a living example of the fact that there IS life after loss, and a happy one to boot!

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